once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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