whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
