Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
she told me i tasted like america
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
