I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
