Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
