it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
