I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
