is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
i think i have herpe
just one?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize