I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
