alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
