Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I wannas sexs uuuuu
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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