well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
