Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
