You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Randomize
