I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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