i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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