the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
