i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
