I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
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