in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
vagina is talking i cant
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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