Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
