sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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