I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
