I'm really into asian looking animals
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize