batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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