what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
