the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
