problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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