hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
she told me i tasted like america
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Randomize
