I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
