We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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