It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
