I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
