She said her name was "party"
Need sex. Gaining weight.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
