if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
