I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
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