Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
The beer is more important than you right now.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
