They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
