i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
