Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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