My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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