i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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