You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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