belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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