Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
