she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
