sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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