his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
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