I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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