yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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